Sunday, August 23, 2009

Inglourious Basterds

                I just saw this movie today, and I can't remember when I had a better time in a theatre for 2½ hours.  The movie was absolutely wonderful, especially for all of us who know WWII lore, and who have spent hours rewriting it to end sooner, and better, in our dreams.  Those who would have liked to see the Nazi regime succeed, including all those American neo-Nazi losers in prison or in militias, should not pay the price of admission for a lot of reasons.  Here are some.

                First, the American hero-warrior of this movie, Lieutenant Aldo Raines, was played by the very excellent Brad Pitt, and surely named for the intrepid film warrior, Aldo Ray.  Tarantino never misses an opportunity like that.  Also Raines was from Tennessee, was part Indian, occasionally sold moonshine back in the hills, and he and his team were the very scourge of the Nazis from 1941 to 1944.  For all you white losers, scourge means a plague—you know, like your mama's head lice, only worse, like an Old Testament plague.  Ain't nothin' our hero enjoys more than killin' Nazis!  He sounds just like you do, and he wants to kill people just like you!

                Second, the dirty dozen to Brad's Lee Marvin were all Jews, except for one who was an ethnic German who just hated Nazis and had killed more than a dozen officers by the time Brad rescued him from prison and recruited him.  These Jews weren't bookish Jews, or old Hassid's with ear-dreads.  No, these Jews were Bugsy Siegel and Murder Incorporated, and they took scalps!  They said little, but they shot, stabbed, and dynamited their way into our hearts.  Oops, your screed about little hook-nosed thieves, swindlers, and child molesters is all wrong.  Wanna see those types?  Look in the mirror, CONVICT, because that's what you're in jail for!

                Third, the evil Nazi SS Colonel who seemed undefeatable, and was always ahead of the political curve until the very end, got his comeuppance.  He was in charge of rounding up all the Jews in France (and almost rounded up our fleeing heroine in the beginning), had supporters in the highest Nazi circles, and was such a canny bargainer that he ends up making a deal with Aldo's OSS General that was going to earn him U.S. citizenship, a colonel's retirement pay, and a house in Nantucket.  (Should I bother to explain "canny" or where Nantucket is to you sorry-ass jailbirds?  Nah, open a reference book that doesn't talk about converting a gun to full auto for a change.)

                I say that this great and entertaining film was a revenge fantasy of the highest order, replete with villains we have grown up to despise, unlikely heroes in these Jews led by a part-Apache hillbilly moonshiner, and a clever young woman and her black copain who provide the hot-as-hell ending for Adolf and a couple hundred of his closest generals. 

                I laughed, I clapped, and I somehow knew that every Obamacrat in America would see this movie as an example of the difference between standing for Obama and standing for the smarmy Conservatives who are backed by the fringe elements you identify with the enemy in this film.

                This movie ends the Nazi movie genre forever; nothing else, no matter how "true" or well-intentioned will mean anything from this point forward.  Quentin Tarantino has made the one Nazi movie that was never made, but was always on our minds.  Bravo, QT (and I loved that down-tempo version of that Bowie song you used.  What better song for shouting fire in a crowded theatre than one that talks about putting out a fire with gasoline?)  Thank you for this great gift!


At Sun Sep 20, 10:35:00 AM PDT, Blogger Pathetic Performance from a Sad, Sad Man said...

Hey Tyrone I think your blog is awesome! You should send a mass email around everytime you post a new one so people will leave comments like me:)

It's Bean, by the way. I just created this blog today so I could post a comment on yours:) I haven't written anything yet, though. What do you think of the name of my blog? I just thought of it kind of out of nowhere-- remember who said it?


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